Firstly, thank you to all the people who have submitted narratives - it has been very informative.
My name is Trish and I live in Australia and look after a 77 year old German lady called Emmie.
Emmie was diagnosed February 2000 with a 6.6cm AAA. She has mild emphysema and has chosen not to have the operation - she cannot have a stent so it would have to be abdominal surgery.
Emmie has no family and very few friends (she is quite a difficult person to get along with unless you know her very well) I am married and have 3 teenage children (2 still at home doing studies) and also work 3 days a week.
She has been reasonably well the past year but the last few months seems to be having more problems. Her breathing has deteriorated and more recently she has been having back and leg pain with bouts of nausea and vomiting intermittently.
She lives alone, about a 10 minute drive from where I live and refuses to have any home help apart from a lady to do her cleaning for an hour once a week. She has got to the stage where she will no longer cook so it means I need to take her a meal every night. I work in a hospital, so I could easily have some services arranged for her, but she steadfastly refuses this! So at this stage we just wait for the terrible end to happen. This is a very draining experience - lack of sleep at night waiting and wondering if tonight will be the horrible night that her aneurysm bursts.
I go over it at night - the phone call - the mad dash to her home and then to the hospital. Will they be able to save her? Will she die in agony? It is all so scary.
Is there anyone else out there who is just waiting? and how do you cope with it?
Update 31 Mar 2001
Well today is the 11th anniversary of my fathers death. In my earlier narrative I did not mention that he died in my arms at his home from an undiagnosed ruptured aneurysm. He died a very painful albeit quick death that absolutely devastated me and my family. Emmie was his lady friend and was also with him when he died, so is aware of the horrific thing that could be awaiting her.
At the moment Emmie has become extremely difficult to get on with, (more so than usual). Very demanding and does not seem to care about any other person than herself. She has alienated a lady that used to talk to her when she was walking her dog and in general become a fair "cow." She says that she has "had enough" although she seems to be no worse physically than before. Her mental attitude has plummeted and she now lives in the "poor me" world. I try and jolly her out of it but with little success. Her Family Physician can no longer cope with her unless I am along and has told her that she is quite welcome to find another Doctor, which she refuses to do. I worry that she will not have her blood pressure monitored if her GP no longer will see her.
Is this attitude a common thing? I know that it must be terrible to know that you have an aneurysm but surely if you choose not to have any treatment then you should try and make the most of the time you have left? I sometimes think that it would be better for everyone if she went - then feel disgusted with myself that I could think that.
Sorry for waffling on - will keep you updated.
Update: 16 May 2002
Just to let you all know that Emmie is still hanging on in there! Her aneurysm now measures 7.2cm and is actually visible when she lays down.
She still has occasional nausea and the pain in her back is becoming more frequent, but she is still able to take a walk now and again. She has come out of the "poor me" stage a lot and is much more pleasant to be around.
Her emphysema is a lot worse and she really needs to be on oxygen, which they will not give her as she is still having the odd cigarette or two - which she steadfastly refuses to give up.
It is now over 2 years since she was first diagnosed and in her case I think she may have made the right decision not to have the operation, considering the risks involved.
Good luck to you all, and I shall keep you informed.
Update: 28 Jun 2003
Well it is over a year since my last update and Emmie is still hanging on in there (grin). More than three years on since her first being diagnosed and her AAA has only grown .1cm in the past year - 7.3cm now. She has had a couple of stays in the hospital, once for a urinary tract infection and once for severe pneumonia (her heart went into arrythmia and they had to do cardiac reversion on her). But lo and behold - she pulled through. She had a bad case of shingles also.
The last few months she has been quite a darling and a pleasure to care for. Quite an about face.
Her breathing is even worse though, I think because of the pneumonia weakening her already weak lungs. She has given up smoking...yahoo. I think they will be able to give her the oxygen that she so badly needs now that she has given up. She can no longer walk to the shops, which she used to enjoy and that really annoys her but as long as I take her on a few outings she seems quite content.
She turns 80 in September and although she doesn't think she will make it, I have no doubt she will :). Funny thing is, we very rarely think about her aneurysm anymore and just concentrate on enjoying now. I believe she made the right choice in not having the operation even though a few of the doctors at the hospital tried to get her to have it - It was the right choice for her and God willing she will have a few more years to come.
Good luck to you all and I shall keep you posted.