Brain Injury Is: writing directions for your family members to get to Courage Center, and forgetting to write down what street it was on or what city it was in.
Amy, my youngest daughter, was talking with me the other night about the importance of carrying Mace to deter would-be attackers. She attends Concordia College in St. Paul and frequently works late at several part-time jobs. After our discussion, I remembered an incident which happened to me on my Montana trip this past summer.
I was in Glacier National Park and was camped out at Many Glacier Campgrounds. One of the many hiking trails out of there was one called Cracker Lake Trail. Before starting out on this trail, I checked in with the ranger station there, as was my habit since I was hiking alone, and was told that Cracker Lake trail was in an area with a fairly high number of grizzly bears. I was told to use particular caution on that hike, especially since I would be by myself.
The first part of this trail was obviously heavily used by horseback riding groups and I spent more time stepping around horse apples than I did looking for bears. The first three or so miles up the trail was through hilly, heavily forested terrain, but every now and then I caught a glimpse of another couple farther up the trail. Finally, after about an hour or so, I caught up with the couple who were women from the East Glacier and Browning communities, located near the southeast entrance to the park. They were a delightful pair, socially engaging, seemingly bright, yet willing to allow this odd-looking stranger to join them on the rest of the hike. (I had a three week-beard, wore shorts, and had legs that looked more like broom handles than something that could get me up a mountain trail.)
As we walked and talked, the conversation drifted to many different topics, including work and what we did for a living. One of the women was the secretary for the Browning School District, while the other was a teacher or assistant at a different school. When my turn came around, I casually mentioned that I was not employed at the present time, and that I was receiving Social Security Disability because of a brain injury. Immediately, the conversation about our jobs stopped. After several minutes of silent hiking, one of the women started talking about all of the bears in the area and that the two women were ready for them. Each of them carried a fairly new product, Bear Mace, to repel bears in case of attack. I told them how thankful I was that they had Mace with them. It did not take me long, however, to see through their thinly disguised threat. They were not as worried about the bears as they were worried about me and my brain injury.
Once at Cracker Lake, we ate and talked about this for a while, and they admitted to becoming frightened of me when I told them of my injury. They were not frightened of me as a male or would-be attacker in general, but they were frightened of my injury. It took some convincing and educating before they felt more at ease with me, and then they were friendly for the rest of the trip. In fact, we sat and had a wine cooler at Many Glacier Hotel after the hike.
I bring this little story up to show, one more time, how people with disabilities are viewed by others in general. The reaction of the two women on the trail demonstrates how individuals with disabilities sometimes are viewed with suspicion and distrust. The term "brain injury" apparently conjures up illusions of sadistic madmen stalking the pathways and sidewalks with knives in their pockets and harm on their minds. Other members of the group at Courage Center have talked about people speaking very slowly to them as if they were now retarded, or speaking very loudly as if they were now deaf.
It is really a little sad that so few people have heard of brain injury. It was last year that national recognition was given to head injury as the Silent Epidemic. Just a few weeks ago, someone mistook a statement about my memory problems and quoted me as having "the mental capacity of a kindergartner." No wonder some people get frightened when they hear of brain injury. I never have carried a knife with me, and I have never in my life attacked anyone. Maybe fear of the unknown does force some people to carry Mace or other human repellants. To me, however, ignorance of physical or mental disabilities is what produces the greatest fear of all. Invite me closer. Let me tell you what I know about brain injury. Let your fear of me be replaced with understanding. Use your Mace on things that actually go BOO in the night.